Today I walked to all my favorite flower beds and even a few new ones across the road because I'm not sure they will survive if we have a big frost tonight. I'm grateful for the motivation they have given me to get outside this summer.
It's really hard to believe that the reason I don't remember any flowers last year except those beside my porch is that last summer I had a temporary knee joint that did not allow me to do any walking for exercise, extreme pain from having cancer carved out of my body and the anticipation of starting excruciating radiation in September.
It's easy to stop being grateful and forget the pain when feeling pretty good is the norm. But you know what? Maybe that's okay. Pins and needles is not an easy or healthy place to live and as long as I am proactive and realistic it's okay to forget. Being grateful all the time is like trying to live inside a sappy unicorn and rainbow Facebook meme and cancels out happy everyday living but looking back every once in a while makes it better.
I'm still struggling with whether I'll change the name of this blog and make my profile words a little less edgy. Who knows. Time will tell. But if I do it will be because I want to and not to comfort anyone else.